Get Unruly

Fork Over Love

• Kim Bolourtchi • Season 2 • Episode 9

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If you have ever had an idea- but didn't pursue it because you didn't know how to make it happen- you MUST hear this story. Tracey Selingo, founder of Fork Over Love, shares how her idea to support restaurants struggling in the pandemic and feed the hungry in her community has resulted in 1100 meals being served just 6 weeks after organizing- and they are just beginning. This is a story about the power each of us has to make a difference, and the true power of love.

Listen in, and help if you can.

www.forkoverlove.org


Kim Bolourtchi:

This is Kim Bolourtchi and you're listening to Boldly Stated. I thought for Valentine's Day we should talk about love, but not the kind of love that needs a relationship or a partner or even deep self introspection. Today we're going to talk about the kind of love that can be shared with your neighbor, with someone you don't even know, by simply participating in a collective effort. We're talking about the work being done by Fork Over Love, a brand new nonprofit that is connecting small local restaurants that were at the risk of going out of business, with people who need food security. This is a story of ingenuity, and creativity. But above all, this is a love story. Listen in to my conversation with Tracy Selingo and prepare to be so so inspired. Honestly, I've been looking forward to this conversation, since you agreed to talk to me about it. And I've been stalking, the website, the news coverage, everything that's happening with Fork Over Love. And I've been having to resist the urge to get on a plane with my gloves, hat, and mask. I like want to be there helping so badly. It is the most inspiring thing in the entire world.

Tracey Selingo:

You can hop on a plane, we will welcome you.

Kim Bolourtchi:

I'm actually, it's going to happen. I'm kind of waiting for a window and maybe for just a slightly warmer temperature. Everybody looks really cold.

Tracey Selingo:

Yes, we are very cold.

Kim Bolourtchi:

So you started Fork Over Love what feels like probably five minutes ago. Is that fair to say?

Tracey Selingo:

I think it was five minutes. So very fair to say. Yes.

Kim Bolourtchi:

So just briefly tell us about the journey from idea to where we are right now.

Tracey Selingo:

Okay, so this is a super cool story. So I had this idea in my head. It wasn't it wasn't really an idea as much as it was just this question. Something just seemed not right to me. And that something was that we had so many restaurants that were struggling, like, literally every day, I was looking at our local paper, and they were covering the stories of another restaurant closing or another issue with a restaurant. And so looking at that and seeing so many that were struggling, and then also seeing our unemployment numbers just go through the roof and seeing the lines at local food banks, and the soup kitchen. And it just didn't make sense. I was like, there's something here that it just does not make sense to me. And I didn't know what that was. And and I just sort of sat with a question for a long time. In December, the question came up again. And it came up with such a power in my heart that I couldn't ignore it. So I started just talking with people about it. You know, mainly my husband just kept saying, don't you think this is crazy? Isn't this a big disconnect? And we were talking one night, and he said, I think this is you know, I think this is kind of easy. I think you just you just link two together. You get takeout, you distribute that. And I was like, Wow. Okay, that that can maybe work. I don't know, I know nothing about restaurants Kim. So this just was so out of my league. So that night, I went to sleep. And I asked for a sign. My my prayer was, if I'm really supposed to do this, because I know that chasing have a question, right? If I'm really supposed to do this, if I'm supposed to figure out the answer, I want a clear and unmistakable sign first thing in the morning. And I woke up and had my coffee and was checking email. And a friend of mine, who happens to be a priest, Father, Tom sent me a note and said, I don't know what happened. But you prominently came into my purse this morning. just sending blessings your way, and said a few more things because it was like the day before Christmas. And then at the end of the email, he said, I want you to know, I think there's an unmistakable spirit inside of you. And I was like, Oh, here we go.

Kim Bolourtchi:

Wow.

Tracey Selingo:

You know, that was my sign. And I made this promise as I was nodding off, and I just felt the gravity of it. And I felt the clarity and immediately reached out to two friends who I thought might be on board. I spoke with two other friends who owned restaurants to make sure that it was something that was feasible. And the Yes, the yeses just came flowing in and we literally had a board of seven women and one advisor formed in three days. The articles were filed for the nonprofit, I think eight days after that, and we had our first board meeting a week later. So we're about Six weeks in right now. And we've held two events, and we've distributed 1100 meals. God, it just chokes me up. So yeah.

Kim Bolourtchi:

It's absolutely amazing. And one of the things that I think is so remarkable that I want people to understand is that you don't have a background in the restaurant business. You don't have a background working with you know, nonprofits that feed the hungry like this is none of this is something you've ever done before. This is you, an amazing human having an idea, and seeing people in need during a pandemic, realizing that there's a need for restaurants to to get support, and people who are seriously hungry in your community and having an idea to join the two.

Tracey Selingo:

Yes, yes. I mean, I don't have my backgrounds in marketing and spiritual healing. So seems like maybe a crazy leap. I mean, I'm just starting to understand where I fit in this process. And you know, it's interesting, because when I was, my husband and I were talking about it that one evening, when we sort of had the plan of how it could actually happen. I said, I said to him, I remember this. This is just beyond me, like I just, I don't know how I will do this. And he he looked right at me, and he said, When are you going to learn that? You don't have to have all the answers. Go find the people with the answers. And it was like it was it was this moment of like, what felt like deep healing for me? of just, yeah, I don't have to have the answers at all. I have said, I don't know more in the past month and a half than I think I have in my entire life. And it's one of the most freeing things in the world. Because answers come in from qualified people. Doors are flying open from qualified people. And we are we are working together hand in hand to make this happen.

Kim Bolourtchi:

It's so inspiring to hear you say that. And I also think that it's so important for people to hear that because one of the biggest roadblocks people run into is I think people have really good ideas. And then I think they stop immediately when they think I'm not qualified. I don't know enough. I'm not good at this thing. I couldn't possibly make it happen. And you are proof that you technically don't have to have, you know, all the answers or even any of them, right, you just need to be willing to ask for help from people who do have the answers. And this is part of the collective sort of mentality that makes the thing like this really work.

Tracey Selingo:

Yes. Yeah. I mean, it's just been an incredible experience. Just to move through that on the back end on a very, like personal note, you know, I I am surrounded by seven incredibly strong, brilliant human beings. All women,

Kim Bolourtchi:

I was gonna say they're all women, right?

Tracey Selingo:

We're all women. Yes, we are, you know, and hey, men are welcome. It is just so empowering to be with these women and to be in their company, and to see them sharing their expertise. And for all of us to be moving through this. I can say pretty much gobsmacked by what's happening. There's just such a current and flow that is both exhilarating and terrifying at the same time.

Kim Bolourtchi:

I can imagine that. So So logistically, um, you've served 1100 meals, but how does fork over love work? So how are you paying the restaurants? And how are you serving the people.

Tracey Selingo:

So the formula is that we seek donations from the community. And we partner with restaurants who are struggling during the pandemic. What we do is with those donations, we purchase takeout meals from them. They, they provide us with completely packaged meals at a host distribution site. So we also partner with places in the community that we think would be a good fit, that can put us in touch with the populations that we need right now. The restaurants deliver their food to the site, an army of volunteers steps up, we get those meals in bags, and we distribute them to the public. So on the back end, we're, you know, we're definitely asking for donations. We're also having restaurants fill out a restaurant application so we can make sure that we're we're working with the right people who really need it. And we take volunteer donations, and we take host site applications. So it really is a collaborative effort. We are we're moving one step at a time because we're moving at the speed of light. So it's incredible. One thing I want to mention is, you know, although we're at We're definitely trying to aid these two struggling groups, restaurants and, and people, we are open to the entire community. So you can come and pick up meals for your neighbor who you know is homebound. You can come and pick up meals, if you've had a horrible day trying to juggle your job and teach your children all from your kitchen table. We are literally trying to just expand and explode the community kitchen idea. So if people want to come and pay their meal forward, they can do that. If they want to come and just take a meal, because they need a meal, they can do that, too. We don't ask for qualifications, we're not asking questions. The most we're doing is taking a reservation to make sure that we can guarantee enough meals for people

Kim Bolourtchi:

That makes me like teary, it's really amazing.

Tracey Selingo:

I just cry non stop. So.

Kim Bolourtchi:

And the thing is about these restaurants, so I looked at the restaurants you're working with, and they're they're small local restaurants in your area, but they're also like fine dining restaurants. They are like, like these are, these are good restaurants.

Tracey Selingo:

These are great restaurants.

Kim Bolourtchi:

And with really delicious food and really great menus, and they are providing this amazing quality food.

Tracey Selingo:

They are so so we pay them $10 per per takeout meal. And we didn't really know what that would look like, we weren't really sure, you know, when that meal came what it would be. And I can tell you that every single restaurant we've partnered with so far has completely totally over delivered to the point where I'm like, I can't believe they put all that in there for $10 you know, everyone is receiving chef made meals. It's It's incredible, and they smell delicious. As we're packing the meals, it's it's it's like overwhelming. They just did they look fantastic. And then the day after today, my email box was filled with thank you notes from people who came last night and had a meal. Who you know, they just they're responding to their reminder to pick it up. They're like that was so good. So it is it's a beautiful thing, you know, and the people in our community are seeing the restaurants that are contributing, they're reaching out to them, they're ordering more from them as a result of this. It's like, all parts are working. And it is so beautiful. to witness this happening.

Kim Bolourtchi:

It's incredible. It's amazing. Um, you know, people say that, and it's a fact right that American society is very individualistic, where it's, you know, we're known for being like, What's in it for me? Right, um, and people often have trouble focusing on the collective. And that's been one of the issues during the pandemic. But I will say this, this project, and the response seems to be strongly challenging that label and assumption.

Tracey Selingo:

It is completely challenging it. I think that prior to the pandemic, we we may have been very individualistic, right? Sitting in isolation for a few months, staring at our own four walls, watching things around us fall apart, having our own lives fall apart in whatever way I mean, I think that we all have had a different scale of how our life has fallen apart since March. And And when that happens, the question becomes, how are you going to put it back together? And what we're finding is that there is such a desire to work together, everyone understands the need that, you know, all the systems that were in place before that would normally help us through an emergency are not in place any longer. And if they are, they're so backlogged that they're not dependable. And I think that that has been the biggest reason why our community is coming together the way that it is, and supporting one another. You know, it is been nobody wants to stay isolate it. Everybody, everybody is looking for an area of hope. Everybody is looking for a way that they can help. We had so many people come back, I was only at one location last night, but we had so many people come through last night and hand us donations for our you know, pay it forward jar that I was just completely blown away. Completely. We raised $394 last night, in that way. And these are people that I think can't really necessarily pay for a meal right now. But $1 or $2 with a love note in a jar. I mean, it was like I couldn't believe it. I can't believe it. Yeah.

Kim Bolourtchi:

Would you want to share a little bit of the feedback that you've gotten? Or perhaps one of those love notes with me? Oh, yeah. Okay. So I want to share one really cool story. And then I'll share a love note with you. I have so many. I have my stack right here, my like stack of love notes. And this is just one area to you know. The thing is, I think we're so in need of hearing these these good stories and all the good things that are happening. So you just feel free to share whatever you like.

Unknown:

Okay, so last week, we had a gentleman show up, and he took these amazing photos for us. He's professional photographer. He's spent, you know, the whole event with us in the freezing cold with his camera. And the next day, I woke up to a Facebook message. And he said, Did anybody find my wallet? So he had lost his wallet at the event. And, you know, we had a nor'easter two days, for the two days prior to the event. So there were snow banks everywhere. It was just like, we're not going to find that wallet, right? So he sent me a note back a day or two later, and he said, you can call off the search, I found my wallet. And he explained where he found it. And he said, I normally don't carry any money in my wallet. But I was praying to St. Anthony. So I was like I had told him to pray to St. Anthony to find it. Right. He said, I was praying to St. Anthony. And I promised that whatever was in my wallet, I would donate. And there was $100 bill in it. Wow. Yeah. So he showed up again last night to take more pictures, another freezing cold event. And I think I can't I read I read these notes. And I just start bawling. But he just sent us a really, really simple note that said, Thank you for caring about our community. Keep it keep doing good things. So that's a gigantic, you know, donation, just from him. Yeah, you know, 10 dinners, I'm now doing meal math all day long. It's just crazy. Thankfully, they're only in $10 increments, right, because I'm a little challenge to that department normally. But you know, here's another really super sweet note. Butterflies on the front of it, thank you for what you do. And it's just one after another like that. It's I am blown away by that. And I'm I appreciate all sighs donations, I'm completely blown away by the ones that are winning $2 people showing up in their car crying. It's just, it's amazing. It's amazing to see people coming together, it's amazing to see how everyone is willing to help one another. It's like, anything that existed before is all out the door. Any way that we were so focused on our own crazy busy lives. Out the door, people just want to help. And they want to they want to come out of the other side of this with restaurants to go to and you know, businesses still still thriving. So that's that's what matters. You know, I think that one of the interesting things about restaurants is that people don't understand just how important they are to a community. You know, yes, they nourish a community. Yes, they feed people. These are the places that we go to, to break bread, obviously, to share a meal to celebrate, to laugh, to cry, to do business, like it's like they do so much. But even more importantly than that is that they employ so many people. They supply so many other businesses, and they keep us rooted to our culture and our history in a way that many other businesses just can't. And so by supporting them, we're supporting all of the people who work for them, who are now the people that we're serving in this line, by the way, you know, they're out of work, because they, they, their jobs just completely went away when the restaurants had started to have to shut down. And it's just it's incredible. So they are they're like a wonderful group to focus on for something like a thriving community.

Kim Bolourtchi:

Absolutely. And I think one of the things that that's so striking to me is that In so many ways, you know, we've we've talked about this, generally, but the pandemic has sort of been a great equalizer in just sort of making people stop thinking about, you know, what I have what someone else has or doesn't have. And in this sort of way of bringing people together, I think perhaps you're in addition to supporting the restaurants and supporting people who, you know, are in need of great food and great meals, you're giving people an opportunity to see each other in a different way and to connect in a different way that perhaps they wouldn't have had before. And so it's like this whole new way of also being as a community that I don't think anyone could have anticipated, but maybe it's just sort of a beautiful peripheral benefit.

Tracey Selingo:

Oh, yeah.I mean, it's an incredible benefit is not something that anybody maybe considered going to a restaurant to get the restaurant to support. The food insecure? But, but why not? I mean, isn't that one of the most natural solutions as to how to do it? You know, we are serving people with dignity and love. We're serving people with dignity, dignity, in love with every single meal in a way that maybe they have never received before.

Kim Bolourtchi:

It's so wonderful.

Tracey Selingo:

And I hope that continues. I mean, I hope, long after we come out of this, our hope is really that that this can continue in this way.

Kim Bolourtchi:

Is that your vision?

Tracey Selingo:

That's my secret vision. Yes.

Kim Bolourtchi:

It's not a secret anymore.

Unknown:

I want us to find a new way of helping each other, I want us to realize that there is nothing that separates us there, because there is nothing that separates us. And I want us to stop talking about food is insecurity. And I want us to start talking about food security. Because we know how important the languages right? We're going to continue to talk about food insecurity, we are never going to get rid of food insecurity. But if we're going to start talking about food security, and finding new ways to provide it, then we're going to give people a basic, a basic anchor. And there's so many Don't get me wrong, there are so many organizations out there doing this. There's like major collaboration that needs to happen on this end, however, in the middle of a storm, like we're in taking the question of where am I going to find my next meal? out of the equation for someone, giving them a hot meal, with dignity that helps them feel loved and cared for by their neighbors? is I think one of the most important things that we can do.

Kim Bolourtchi:

I love your, the way you state it, I think it's on your website, "When you feed your neighbors like family, everyone benefits"

Tracey Selingo:

Yep. Everyone does.

Kim Bolourtchi:

Yeah. And it's just such a beautiful, beautiful way to describe exactly what you're doing. Um, because it's not just, you know, providing us thing, it's providing all of the things,

Tracey Selingo:

All of the things to all of the people. Mm hmm. And trusting that, that everyone will do the right thing in return. And that is what I saw last night. I saw it work last night on that level last night was the first time that we were open to the public. So our event the week before was a pilot event. And we tried to keep it very controlled, just to make sure that that it would work and that and that we would do it. But last night, the two events that we had in two different locations were open to the public. And so from where I was seeing, seeing what was happening, was exactly what I had envisioned from the beginning. And it was just so amazing to see it come together in that way. And who knows where it'll go. Our goal from from day one was to help find the people who are falling between the cracks right now. And yeah, or they're there.

Kim Bolourtchi:

And you're doing it.

Tracey Selingo:

We're doing it.

Kim Bolourtchi:

That's so cool.

Tracey Selingo:

So by the grace of God, we're doing it.

Kim Bolourtchi:

I mean, literally, right? Yeah. Um, so what do you need? What if people want to help which I know they will? What do you need? How can we help you?

Tracey Selingo:

We need donations first and foremost. We cannot operate without donations. We You know, we have to limit the number of meals that are going out right now. But we just need, we need donations. So we need donations, we need volunteers. And we need host sites. And we need restaurants, we need all the parts all at once. The order flow for us is donations, that will lead us to our restaurants that leads us to our host site that leads us to our volunteers, so we can deliver a meal. So without money, we really, we can't pay the restaurants.

Kim Bolourtchi:

Right? So you're operating right now, exclusively in Pennsylvania,

Tracey Selingo:

we are exclusively in Pennsylvania, I've had some people reach out from other states. We're trying we're you know, we're such a tiny board. But we're trying to be so smart about the way that we're going to be able to scale this. And so I do think that's, that's going to be possible sooner rather than later. This can happen anywhere, you know. So, so yes, we are in Pennsylvania, we're operating in northeast Pennsylvania, we are in one county looking to get into the next County. I mean, we're just, we're just expanding.

Kim Bolourtchi:

So if you're in northeast Pennsylvania, and you want to show up and help or you have a restaurant, then you can do those things. But a lot of my listeners are all over the country, you can donate, you can donate, because we can help by donating the incredible mission. Yes. We start our donations at$10. We are, we are literally using every cent that comes in to put a plate in front of someone that is where the money is going, I think it's really important to understand that our entire group is 100%. Volunteer, small but mighty. And we are simply bridging we're bridging the donations to the restaurants and the food to the people. Amazing. And I think that's why it's working. I've got to tell you, I think that's why it's working. It's just the most inspiring, inspiring thing from beginning to where you are right now. I mean, it's it's truly, it's every part of the story is incredible from the part of you have an idea, but it's not really your area, because that lets people know that you don't have to be an expert to have an impact to the part of all these people coming together to support your mission, which shows people that they can help. Even if they don't really know, you know how that there's always a way. I mean, all of it, you know, everybody coming forward to help their neighbor, not just thinking about what's in it for me, or how I survived this moment makes everyone better together. And you can say it 1000 ways, but when you have an example that it's working and how it's working. Um, it's just it is the most heartwarming thing, which is why this is my Valentine's Day episode because honestly, to me, this is like the best. It's the best love, this is the best love.

Tracey Selingo:

Well, I'll tell you what, thank you for that. Thank you. It is. I truly believe that our only currency is love. That's it. It is love. That is the number one currency, we have to connect with one another, to help one another and to lift one another. And so if your currency comes with love and money, fantastic if your currency is showing up and helping, fantastic that that's all that we need. But it it really and truly is. It really truly is the flow through all of this. Last night we had a gentleman show up his name was Joe, he was out walking in the neighborhood came up to me, had his mask on had the bluest eyes in the world, which is always something like just I don't know, I was just struck. They were like, you could see through them. And he said, can I help? And I said, Of course you can help. Were you coming up just to help or did you want a meal? He said, Well, I won't turn away a meal, but I don't work for it. And he worked on my you know, it was freezing. And then at the end of the night, one of the restaurants, Three cheers cafe. They showed up and they were walking in with six trays of pizza. And there was a Boy Scout meeting that was filing into the church to start and so we kind of all assumed that they were having pizza at the boy scout meeting. And we said what are you doing and they said somebody has to feed you So, we were all fed with the most delicious pizza last night. I mean, it was just, it was just one of those nights, you know, it was really seeing the full circle of what happens when you when you really route yourself to love.

Kim Bolourtchi:

Thank you for what you're doing. Thank you for having the courage to go with your idea. And just being brave and taking those steps and the impact that you're having. It's, it's brilliant and amazing and inspiring and all of it. It's so wonderful. And I just can't wait to see what you do.

Tracey Selingo:

Thank you. Me too. I can't wait. Who knows? Right?

Kim Bolourtchi:

Yeah, yeah, um, I'm gonna put links to your website in the show notes. But if you don't look at the shownotes Will you please say the website just in case anyone's listening and they want to hop on their phone and look right now?

Unknown:

Absolutely. It's fork verlove.org

Kim Bolourtchi:

Super easy. Super easy. Yeah. And I'll also put some links to the the news articles, the press. That's really exciting, really fun. Um, and of course, we'll continue to follow your amazing progress.

Tracey Selingo:

Thank you.

Kim Bolourtchi:

Yeah, thank you for being here today.

Tracey Selingo:

Thank you for having me.

Kim Bolourtchi:

This is Kim Bo ourtchi. And you've be n listening to Boldly Stat